Always looking for a "little good news"...well, I have some. My niece, Leah Kathryn Killebrew, is officially engaged. We needed some upbeat news this week and this is it! She and David will marry in Grapevine TX, January, 2011. An exciting time their lives. We sent our hearty congratulations to Leah, David,her parents, Dan and Teresa and David's family.
It feels like a normal day here. Jim is jack hammering out old tile --- good bye to very dirty rose colored grout. New tile is coming on Thursday. The entry, kitchen and laundry room will finally wear the same tile. And no rose colored grout in sight. I think this all falls into "a little good news".
I am looking forward to Mother's Day. Time with Molly and to be together as a family.
This has been a very difficult 2 weeks. Not impossible; difficult. Chemotherapy is does not just affect me physically, it affects me at every level. All who have been down this road are grateful for the medical community and the advances in treating cancers that would have killed us even five years ago. It is, however, a mixed bag. I want the treatments, but so dislike the effect this has had on my entire life. Though I'm in the beginning phase of this, I find if I admit to what I do not like, I do better than if I'm trying to play a game of "this is fine". That's not reality...because cancer is never fine - being sick with anything, is not "fine".
Right after my diagnosis, I found a book, The Anatomy of Hope. As I've skimmed through some other blog sites, this book, touches deep. Dr. Groopman writes this in his introduction.
"Hope is one of our central emotions, but we are often at a loss when asked to define it.. Many of us confuse hope with optimism, a prevailing attitude that "things turn out for the best." But hope differs from optimism (positive thinking). Hope does not rise from being told to "think positively", or from hearing an overly rosy forecast. Hope, unlike optimism, is rooted in unalloyed reality. Hope is the elevating feeling we experience when we see - in the mind's eye - a path to a better future. Hope acknowledges the significant obstacles and deep pitfalls along that path. True hope has no room for delusion."
I am deeply grateful to this dear doctor for his work in the areas of cancer and AIDS, but for his research on hope; for real hope is that which keeps me fighting and getting up out of bed everyday. To all of you fighting battles in your life. Grab hold of true hope and know God is in the midst of every battle.
That should do it for today. A very blessed, happy, fun, wonderful, satisfying, non cooking, Mother's Day to all of you marvelous women who love and serve your families. Here's to you!
Thank you, Leslie for the reminder: "Though I walk in the midst of trouble, YOU preserve my life...Ps. 138:7
love kathryn