I always enjoyed reading "Are You My Mother?" It was sweet and everyone was kind to the new little hatchling. That books and show like that were just comforting, funny and made you feel good about how life was going. Learning was taking place, new words were being identified by the one being read to. Soon, so soon, she was literally covered in all of her books. Reading them as fast as she could. She knew the "jist" of every story at age 3, just not all of the words..who cared? She had developed a passion for reading. As the bystander in this little life, I had prayed for this and found my prayer answered in spades.
I also prayed the ocean would be a place of incredible delight - the vastness would not scare or be a place that felt dirty due to the sand. To this day I see a 2 yr old - holding her arms full out, looking at the ocean and the sky...as if in worship for all she was taking in. I said thank you.
These past few years have taken a toll on me, on both of us, that is indescribable. We remember HER. The core of her. The being God created. We are now seeing another side. Things I cannot discuss. I DO know this. The precious word that God started in her is being hidden. It's being put under a bushel basket. She is alone and does not know where to turn. She has chosen to turn to the world for answers and it is a void.
We've literally prayed 1000s of prayers for her. As have our friends and family. People who do not know us, utter fine and precious words to God on her behalf.
She is in so much noise (to quote a friend) she cannot hear Him knocking, every so gently upon the door to her heart.
We are confused. We live a simple and quiet life. We know things we cannot discuss at this time or maybe never. We simply beg you pray for Jim and I. We had entered the land of giants, they are all around us. However, we know we have a God who can squash a giant with merely a thought. Our God loves her. Loves us. Is not wringing his hands but is weeping the prayer of lament over his little lamb.
Pray specifically for our anger...though it's part of this process...to use it for good. Pray for sleep. Jim sees a neurosurgeon on Tuesday morning in Phoenix. We do not know (though we've asked) what he is going to say to Jim.
You are always a blessing - like gold, spun gold, in our lives. There is not one of you who has not crossed into the fast moving waters or stood on the edge of a mountain and wondered how you were going to get out.
We want to live in grace. Be God's precious children. We want peace restored as well as calm. We may not get that. We pray for strength to be what we are called to be. Though surrounded by great darkness, He is the Light of the World.
love kathryn
5 comments:
In the storms, all of them, the Almighty Father is there -- whether it's a Hurricane Irene or spiritual attack, even one meted out through the ones we love the most. As Christians we often speak abstractly of sharing in Christ's sufferings -- and then it really happens. I cannot relieve your dismay and pain (but I share it). And I am praying against the forces of destruction knowing and trusting that "if God is for us, who can be against us?" Our Lord is Faithful and True -- His truth and His love will win out. Jeff and I have your backs, but more importantly, Christ Jesus our Lord does. He goes before you and behind you and is within you -- everlasting Love.
Rest in His promises my sister.
Lisa
God hears and will answer your prayers! Praying for your family.
Praying for the little darling we remember so fondly. Words seem inadequate but know our hearts are lifting up prayers for all. Believing even now she may be listening to the Spirit's beckoning. Blessings and comfort to you all
23 May God himself, the God of peace, sanctify you through and through. May your whole spirit, soul and body be kept blameless at the coming of our Lord Jesus Christ. 24 The one who calls you is faithful, and he will do it.
Praying for each of you for God's love and protection, and specifically for someone to enter her life and lead her out of the darkness and back into His light.
Love you,
Debbie
When I read the one that started with “Are you my Mother/”, my heart just bled for you both. I put in my response that I have a little black cat eraser on my keyboard that lets me know this sweet child will be back. It is hard to see things happen in the teen years, but doubly hard to see them confused in the young adult years. struggling for direction,
I pray for you both, and I even asked my Sunday School class to pray for you too. I have used clips from your blog, Kathryn, to prepare my Communion Meditations, or yesterday, to prepare my Sunday School lessons. You have such beautiful incite and witness. I am so sorry you and Jim have been through all you have, but you never lose purpose. That is amazing. And very humbling for me. I lose purpose and focus all the time. But your witness makes me stronger.
Take care and know you are loved. All of you.
Jean
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