Friday, June 17, 2011

Open Doors...

"When one door closes, another opens;
but we often look so long and so regretfully
upon the closed door that we do not see
the one which has opened for us."
-Alexander Graham Bell



I love doors. New Mexico hosts some pretty wonderful doors.  Massive doors on churches as well as hotels and a host of other places. Intricate and massive iron work.  At one time, perhaps there was a great need to keep the bad out.  Or they were expecting a bad winter. Or they simply loved large, imposing doors.
We recently hung a new bedroom door.  We love the look - a wood panel door (painted white).  Instantly the view from our room looks warm and welcoming.  I do not care for flat doors.  Where is the character? 
 If I were able to travel the world, I'd find doors that are simply a piece of fabric over an opening in someones dwelling place.  I'd find tall, skinny doors and wide and overwhelming in size doors.  Some places I would travel to - there wouldn't be a covering at all.  It would be an opening that you would simply crawl into.  Perhaps there are almost, ALMOST, as many differences in doors as their are in people. 
Closed doors are rarely looked at as opportunities to grow and change.  Closed doors state: closed for business; go away, we don't want anything; we've locked out the world and are staying to ourselves or it could simply be we do not want the heat or cold blowing into our homes.  As Mr. Bell says, we stare at them regretfully, we can't help but wonder why that door closed.  There is loss; we pause...
Open doors are for peeking into, are welcoming, are intriguing, particularly when the rest of the doors are closed.  Open doors draw us in.  If the door is into a place we've never been before, we feel some apprehension.  However, those feelings fall away.  As if we are beckoned inside, we are intrigued and step in.  We adjust to the light or darkness.  We look around.  We know immediately if this is something of interest or not.  When I walk in - I have an immediate sense of knowing whether I am welcome or not.  No sign needed - not a word uttered.  You just know.
When reading this quote, I thought of Lot's wife.  Though she was living in a city that was truly uninhabitable on every level you can think of, it was her home.  There is not much said about her, but I think of her often.  She was told to leave her home and NOT look back. We know from reading this story, they had a door.  I believe their door was hung to keep out the bad things - things she and her family didn't want to be involved in or see. This was an instance of believing there was security behind a door.  Her heart came to believe their home WAS secure.  She, like me, would have been better served by listening to wisdom.  And keeping her eyes focused on what lay ahead, not behind.
In our childhood home, the front & back doors were seldom locked.  We had a skeleton key for many years.  We kept our windows open in the spring and summer to catch the Kansas breeze. Teresa and I shared a bedroom with one window.  From our window, we could see our driveway, a narrow side yard, a row of poplar trees and a wheat field.   Down the street lay train tracks where the Rock Island trains rolled, day and night.  On hot summer nights, we'd pile our pillows in the frame of the open window, hoping to catch a bit of breeze.  We'd listen to the crickets and the trains on their ways to places, so distant we could only imagine where they were and what they looked like. Writing this, I am taken back in time.  Laying in our open window, waiting for a breeze - listening to the sounds of the night - we felt safe and protected. In our minds, there was nothing unsafe about unlatching the screen to that window. 
Perhaps you look at your life as a series of doors and windows.  I can't say that I think like that very often.  When I hear the expression, "When God closes a door, He opens a window", it's a reminder that we are not always the ones with our hands on the door knob or the part that opens the window.
I've been through a door similar to the door on the wardrobe to Narnia.  I've see things this past year I didn't know existed.  More importantly, I've experienced the opening of both doors and windows to my heart, mind and soul.  I've walked through many doors and have found God in many forms and shapes and sizes.  His Spirit led me through those open windows and closed others.  As I made my way through a series of doors and windows...I gained trust that I never had.  I experienced and hopefully returned love as deeply as I've experienced.  I came to see these particular doors with a different perspective. I found purpose and meaning for my life as I stepped inside  My life was waiting...and those lives that touched me were inside. What if fear had kept me outside?!  
Behind some doors, I was hit with misunderstanding, twisted perceptions and hate.  As I approached these doors, they were loudly and sharply closed in my face. With hope in my heart, my prayer in the night is restoration - an opening of the door --- a flinging open of a window.  For light to fill the space and a song of redemption will be heard through the open windows.
A childhood visual remains but now I see it differently.  No coercion. No threats.  No yelling. No fifteen verses of "Just As I Am", No pleading.  Only this -
"Behold, I stand at the door and knock."  (revelation)
We all face closed doors and closed windows.  We all have serious doubts and wonder where we are heading to next.  
Don't just admire the doors and the fancy handwork on those doors, step through.  A part of your life you were not expecting may be in there. 
 (I needed this!)
Have a great weekend.  love kathryn

6 comments:

Dan said...

Doors or Windows can also be partially open and our fear prevents us from entering. He is with us...

Anonymous said...

Joanne made a comment the other day that I think you'd appreciate. “During life's difficulties, who you are is simply amplified … your reactions to life’s unexpected challenges and the turmoil it brings reveals the best and worst.” - Joanne Ford – June 2011 Searcy, AR.
From my perspective, all the wonderful insights you have had through your life threatening struggle and they way you have shared them to build up others clearly and strongly indicates you are one of the “good guys!” The goodness that is Kathryn was simply amplified and burned brightest when it was the darkest! We have all been lifted up through your focused determination and passionate faith in a great God that is good. Loving and missing you both! Matthew and Joanne

DeAnna said...

Kathryn, you need to put your blogs into a book and have it published. Your insights are very inspirational and enjoyable. :O) The good thing about cataract surgery is that you can actually have lasik done at the same time and it will be covered by insurance since it is listed as cataract surgery. Get rid of those glasses! Keep us updated. We love and miss you both very much.

H. Edmond Roberson said...

It occurs to me that we see closed doors - sometimes perhaps - because we aren't really looking for the open ones. Perhaps.

joyce said...

I LOVE doors! I love the doors in Europe...I love the door in your photo!

Anonymous said...

People who have no or few struggles have very few insights into life. You and Jim have had far more than your share. Your observations are sharpened by the difficulties you have faced and lived through and are a blessing to the rest of us. You have made me think of things I don't usually notice and make me appreciate life more. You both have been blessings to me for a long time. I hope to be blessed by your wisdom for a long time.